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THE STUPID LITTLE GIRL

Imagine a little girl, no older than seven, who is asked to go to her room to fetch her jacket. As she steps through the doorway, her eyes catch sight of a toy—a bright, colorful object that invites her into the timeless world of play. For a moment, she forgets the jacket and gets lost in her own imagination.

When she emerges from her room, jacketless, an adult looks at her and says, “What’s wrong with you? You’re so stupid! You let me down.”

Pause for a moment. Imagine how that little girl might feel. Even if she tries to brush it off, something inside her would shrink. A spark of self-worth might dim. Now, imagine that you are the parent of that child, standing in the doorway, witnessing this exchange. You would almost certainly feel a surge of protectiveness, perhaps even anger toward the abuser. You might step in and say, “That’s no way to speak to her!”

Yet, how often do we speak to ourselves or those we love in this very same way? Inside each of us lives a version of that little girl—or little boy—our inner child. And how often, when we forget something, make a mistake, or fail to meet our own expectations, do we say to ourselves, “What’s wrong with you? You’re so stupid.” Perhaps we don’t say it out loud, but the thought arises, unbidden and cruel. 

When we engage in this kind of negative self-talk, it is, in a very real sense, a breach of our own boundaries. Think about it: how can you expect others to treat you with kindness and respect if you can’t extend the same courtesy to yourself? How can you demand the world not insult you when you so easily hurl insults at your own inner child?

Negative self-talk is like living with an abuser, a harsh critic, who never leaves your side. It is a voice, a spell, that diminishes your worth, sows doubt, and undermines your potential. And yet, you have the pure power to interrupt this pattern, to stand up for yourself just as you would defend that little girl in the doorway.

Here’s my challenge to you: for the next seven days, track your thoughts. Write down every instance of negative self-talk you catch yourself thinking. Don’t judge yourself for having these thoughts—simply notice them, as though you were observing a stranger. And when you see those unkind words appear on the page, imagine yourself as the parent of your inner child. Ask yourself: “Would I allow anyone else to speak to me this way?” Then, gently but firmly, stand up for yourself and say "No Thank You" to the abuser.

For an interesting method on eliminating the Internal Abuser, read the Pure Power Post. 




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